Gone to the dogs.

August 16, 2009

Can someone please explain the reasoning and logic behind the idea of inviting an animal to live in one’s home?

Let me get this straight – millions of human beings have animals living in their homes – animals who will willfully destroy said humans’ property, who shit, piss, puke and sleep all over said humans’ flooring.  Dogs, cats, rabbits, mice, rats, snakes, lizards – you name it.  I just don’t get it.

Hey, I find puppies and kittens as cute as anyone else with half a heart.  But to invite one of these monsters to LIVE in my house?  Shit on my old newspapers?  Eat processed food from a bowl on the floor?  I can’t imagine it.

I grew up with animals in my house, and you know what?  The dogs and cats would shit and piss and puke all over the house.  Except in one place – my bedroom.  Wanna know why?  Because I kept my bedroom door shut at all times.  Keep the fuckers out.

But I LOVE animals.  In fact, I love them so much that I don’t even eat them or anything that comes from them.  And I also love them so much that I don’t want to keep them domesticated or enslaved in any way, including for companionship.  Why would I want, for instance, to keep a bird in a cage in my house?  Because he has pretty feathers, or because he can whistle a tune on command?  That’s so fucking selfish.

Pet owners – make your case.  Are you really willing to put up with the smell of ass for the sake of some Pavlovian loyalty?  And don’t compare dogs and cats to children or I will bitch-slap you.