Five rings of bullshit.

August 12, 2008

I used to love the Olympics as a child. I would stare at the TV, transfixed by the gathering of all nations in a friendly competition intended to melt all borders, barriers and beefs between the world’s people. Kum Ba Yah, baby!

But the media (as usual) have ruined it for me. They say it’s not political but, of course, they just HAD to pan over Dubya’s reaction to Iraq’s entry into the Parade of Nations during the opening ceremony. I don’t know about you, but I’m trying to forget about all that shit for a while. And if it’s really about the gathering of the world’s athletes, then why do they HAVE to focus so microscopically on the American athletes? Oh, some Australian dude broke a world record in swimming? If he’s not American and his name isn’t Michael Phelps, who cares? And by the way – the American’s just got 12th place in pig shaving! Quick – pan to the proud parents while some gold medalist from some other country other than the U. S. of A. talks to the nice reporter from the BBC, who actually give a damn about the true spirit of the Olympics.

I know, I know, Sullivan’s world record was beat by, well, um, Phelps. The following day. But you get my point. Phelps himself said that the media are the ones making a big deal out of him and all he is doing is “swimming fast.”

Turn the TV off, people. Besides – all these American Olympians are headed for one of the following:

1. Teaching other rich people’s kids how to swim (or run or row or…)

2. A job with ESPN, NBC, or some other sports affiliate.

3. Living off endorsement money.

4. Public speaking.

5. Waking up and realizing that, shit, I gotta stop inspiring the world and get a real job.