The man never sleeps.

March 12, 2009

So, we’ve got the upcoming Faith No More reunion tour to look forward to (that is, if you live in Europe – the rest of us will have to wait for shitty, wobbly cell phone YouTube videos).   Then there’s Mondo Cane:

and Fantomas:

and Peeping Tom:

and a zillion other projects.

But now he’s just scored his first feature film.  I guess I know what I’ll be doing on April 17th.

My life as a M.P.F.

March 10, 2009

Here we go again.  This stylish son of a bitch is hands down the best vocalist in any genre that ever lived, IMHO.  And these guys are getting back together!!!! – however briefly, and not even on this side of the Atlantic.  Still, that is some of the best news I’ve heard in ages.  Meanwhile, enjoy this little nugget, featuring the song of the day that I cannot get out of my head to save my life.

Same old song and dance.

November 8, 2008

A friend was recently at a memorial service in a Catholic church, and happened upon a stack of memos next to the piano which read as follows (a copy of which she gleefully stole for me!):

On August 8, 2008, Bishop Arthur J. Serratelli of Paterson, N.J., chairman of the U.S. bishops’ Committee on Divine Worship, announced a new Vatican directive regarding the use of the name of God in the sacred liturgy.  Specifically, the word “Yahweh” may no longer be “used or pronounced” in songs and prayers during liturgical celebrations.

This directive affects the following songs currently included in OCP’s various missal programs:

“I Lift Up My Soul” by Tim Manion
“Let the King of Glory Come” by Michael Joncas
“Me Alegre” by Carlos Rosas
“Sing a New Song” by Dan Schutte
“The Lord is King” by Rory Cooney
“You Are Near” by Dan Schutte
“Yahweh” by Gregory Norbet/Weston Priory

Unfortunately, at the time the directive was announced, the 2009 editions of these books had already been printed and, in many cases, shipped.  The 2010 editions will include revised versions of the songs with updated texts.

The memo went on to include links to PDF versions of the updated songs that could be downloaded and reproduced, etc. etc.

OK, it sounds to me like there’s some real bullshit going on here.

First of all, talk about inefficiency.  Couldn’t the clowns in big hats at the Vatican make these decisions before they went to press on the songbooks?

So, the gripe is with the word “Yahweh”.   According to Catholic Culture, “[t]he Vatican has ruled that the Name of God, commonly rendered as ‘Yahweh,’ should not be pronounced in the Catholic liturgy.”

What’s the deal?  According to Wikipedia, “Yahweh is the English rendering of יַהְוֶה, a proposed vocalization of the Tetragrammaton יהוה as it appears in the Hebrew Bible. It is commonly subordinated into the title ‘God’ in popular bibles, or the Tetragrammaton translated as ‘JHVH’‘ Jehovah’ both of which remain commonly disputed.”

OK, so it’s just a fucking word.  Right?  Oh no.  “Modern observant Jews no longer voice the name יַהְוֶה aloud. It is believed to be too sacred to be uttered and is often referred to as the ‘Ineffable’, ‘Unutterable’ or ‘Distinctive Name’.”

What?  So there are some words that shouldn’t be said aloud?  Like “Fire!” in a crowded theatre?

So, what does this strange, superstitious Jewish tradition have to do with Catholic liturgy?  Well, apparently, the practice of pronouncing the Tetragrammaton has “crept in”, somehow to Catholic worship.  They make it sound like some nasty viral infection or something.  (Catholic Culture won’t tell me, but I’ll bet you anything it was those damned freethinkers among the Catholics who introduced this practice.)

Once again, religion and all of its paranoia and superstition has descended upon language – which is just the utterance of certain syllables – and, this time, taken aim at its own.  It’s bad enough when the devout are always saying things like “Jeezum Crow!” or “Holy cow!” and inviting us secular heathens to do the same, lest we might offend someone or – gasp! – take the lord’s name in vain!!!! – but it’s even funnier when, within their own ranks, there is all of this dispute about how, specifically, to sing praises to their invisible daddy.

My question is – does it really matter whether or not Catholics sing Yahweh at Mass?  I mean, what is this really about?  I suspect it has to do with reverence or honor of Biblical “history” (if you can call it that) and even more to do with just another way to exert some sense of authority and control over the devout.  All of these little directives only serve to erode the individual’s sense of autonomy and sovereignty, little by little, and mold each individual into the homogenous lump of servile Catholic humanity.   I know that sounds big and scary – but then, so is the Catholic religion.

Hooker with a penis.

August 21, 2008

I can’t get this song out my head today. For lack of inspiration, I leave you with this to chew on. I’ve even included the lyrics so you can sing along at home! Tool makes selling out sound so kick-ass.

I met a boy wearing Vans, 501s, and a
Dope beastie T, nipple rings, and
New tattoos that claimed that he
Was ogt,
From 92,
The first ep.

And in between
Sips of coke
He told me that
He thought
We were sellin out,
Layin down,
Suckin up
To the man.

Well now I’ve got some
Advice for you, little buddy.
Before you point the finger
You should know that

I’m the man,
And if I’m the man,
Then you’re the man, and
He’s the man as well so you can
Point that fuckin finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I’ve sold you,
Dumb fuck.
I sold out long before you ever heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shit,
And you bought one.

So I’ve got some
Advice for you, little buddy.
Before you point your finger
You should know that
I’m the man,
If I’m the fuckin man
Then you’re the fuckin man as well
So you can
Point that fuckin finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I’ve sold you,
Dumb fuck.
I sold out long before you ever heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shit,
And you bought one.

All you read and
Wear or see and
Hear on TV
Is a product
Begging for your
Fatass dirty
Dollar

So…shut up and

Buy my new record
Send more money
Fuck you, buddy.

As I see it, here’s the gospel truth about god, religion, war, televangelists, xenophobia and American foreign policy all wrapped neatly in a rock ‘n’ roll song. It’s a shame this genius is dead and gone. But, thanks to YouTube, he still lives on.