Ann Coulter is a cunt.

October 18, 2012

By now, everyone has probably seen this week’s highly offensive tweet that originated in the cortex of this supposed paragon of conservative morality and decency.  If not, it goes as follows:

“Last Thursday was national ‘coming out’ day.  This Monday is national ‘disown your son’ day.”

Was she joking?  Who knows.  Maybe a little, but probably not.

Can she say things like this?  Of course she can.

Should she say things like this?  Only if she wants to win the “cuntiest cunt of the cunting universe” award.  But she was already in the running for that post anyhow.

For her to be so cavalier in her attitudes towards a very real scenario that plays out in the living rooms and at the kitchen tables of households all over this planet is quite shocking, even to someone as cynical as I am.

Sad thing is, comments like these from someone in her position of influence over thousands of equally close-minded bigoted cunt-heads will only serve two purposes: to further galvanize said bigoted cunt-heads and to further ostracize the very people for whom one would hope their Christian compassion would instead hope to embrace lovingly.

Then again, who the fuck said morality comes from the bible?  Oh yeah, that’s right – the asshole Christians themselves who for centuries have also used that same ill-authored document to justify and sanction slavery, genocide, rape, torture, incest, murder and other similar feel-good human activities.

Ann, do us all a favor and keep your stupid cunt-head mouth shut and get back to what you do best — which is, well, unfortunately, being a stupid cunt.  Damn.  Well, how about this – have you considered a career in adult entertainment?  I hear that there is a quite a market for it, especially among the sexually repressed religious folk with whom you seem to have a lot in common.   Just sayin’.

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I’ve been silent too long.

September 20, 2012

Well, faithful readers… I’m back.

It’s been too long.  There is too much bullshit going on that needs to be addressed.  I’ve been remiss in doing my part, as Hitch put it, to destroy the enemies of civilization.

Stay tuned for more vitriol, more reason — and, I hope, more pursuit of truth, wherever that path may lead me.

I live in the idyllic setting of northern New England, where crystal clear bodies of water and serpentine rivers rest beneath snow-capped mountain peaks and dense forests.  This setting, of course, brings all kinds of tourists to the area, and the particular region in which I reside enjoys a certain year-round tourist appeal – skiing in the winter; hiking, boating, etc. in the spring and summer; leaf peeping in the fall.  But the one tourist-driven activity that seems to dominate all others is shopping – shop ’til you freakin’ drop!  In neighboring New Hampshire, where there is no sales tax, villages swell with the sprawl of outlet stores, strip malls, five and dimes, T-shirt emporiums, and all other assortment of purveyors of “stuff”.

While driving through one such town in New Hampshire recently, I was struck by the existence of a store called Mattress Giant.  I find it astounding that there is enough of a mattress market that there are stores all over this country – including in rural New Hampshire – that are open for hours each day, selling mattresses. Who are these people who are going out in droves each day and buying mattresses?  Of all things!  Are people really wearing out their old mattresses quickly enough and in enough numbers that would warrant an entire chain of stores called MATTRESS GIANT?

Is it just me, or this is just plain weird?

This is why you’re fat.

February 10, 2009

Here are a few choice photos from my favorite website of the day.  Enjoy, and go check out the rest of the pictures on that website, you fat fucks!!
Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheddar Cheeseburgers

Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheddar Cheeseburgers

Candied Bacon Ice Cream

Candied Bacon Ice Cream

Gregory’s 120 Ounce Steak

Gregory’s 120 Ounce Steak

Tombstone Deep Dish Pizza Vending Machine

Tombstone Deep Dish Pizza Vending Machine

The Double Bacon Hamburger Fatty Melt  Three bacon-stuffed grilled cheese sandwichs for buns, cheese, bacon and two four-ounce beefs patties.

The Double Bacon Hamburger Fatty Melt. Three bacon-stuffed grilled cheese sandwiches for buns, cheese, bacon and two four-ounce beef patties.

No silent H here.

January 13, 2009

It’s not “an historic event.”

It’s “a historic event.”

Stop trying to make me sound like a Brit.

English comic Frank Skinner is no stranger to the usage of  “dirty words” and has even defended swearing as a necessary part of comedy and language.  (As well he should – he’s absolutely right. )

Recently, however, he’s taken to removing swearing from his stand up act – not on moral grounds, he insists, but in an attempt to “freshen up” his act.  As a result of his experiment, he suddenly seems to have found a new appreciation for swearing, rather than a revulsion for it.  He told the BBC that he thought “there was now too much swearing on TV”.  OK, that doesn’t sound good, but he goes on to say that “I don’t want people using so much swearing that there’s a blanket ban because there won’t be then any room for the clever swearing – the beautiful, eloquent swearing.”

The old “less is more” adage.  I can agree with him to a point.  But, where do you draw the line, Frank?  Do you keep a staff of TV censors on hand to make sure that certain words aren’t uttered more than a certain quota?  Can you see these poor bastards, prepping the cast?  “OK, it says here you can only say ‘shit’ 4 times in the course of an hour, so you gotta keep track of that… oh, and try to keep the F-bomb to a minimum, too.”

Oh, but we’ll have to wait on that F-bomb.  According to a BBC article, “[a] poll for The Sunday Times found 30% of people believed the F-word should be banned while 55% thought the C-word should not be allowed. But 49% of the viewers said there should be a place for swearing on television.”

So fuck and cunt have no place on TV?  Those 2 little syllables, eh?  They’re enough, apparently, to keep sponsors and viewers away.  But other swear words, like “asshole” and “cocksucker”, apparently, do have a place on TV?

I know I’ve said this before, but isn’t this all rather ridiculous?  Certain syllables are OK while others are not?

Well, the language police are at it again.  This time, a little boy in New Jersey was denied a birthday cake when the ShopRite supermarket from which his mother ordered his cake refused to put his name on the cake.  The boy’s full legal name just happens to be Adolph Hitler Campbell.

Yeah, that’s a pretty fucked up name for a kid, especially when you consider the names of his siblings:  JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell.   You just can’t make this shit up!

Their lame-brained parents aren’t really racist, they say.  They don’t care if their kids hang out with blacks or other races.  They just thought it would be cool to name their kids uniquely.  I mean, who the hell else would dare to name their kid after the world’s most infamous Jew killer?

A spokesperson for ShopRite said that they “reserve the right not to print anything on the cake that we deem to be inappropriate.  We considered this inappropriate.”

The Campbells were able to get their cake at a nearby Wal-Mart, who, in light of all this press, are now questioning their policies about cake decorating.  They may soon instate a similar policy to ShopRite, which, basically, amounts to “if we or someone else might find it offensive, we won’t do it.”

Now, hold on here.  As strange as many might think it is to name your kids in such a way, there is no reason in the world why they shouldn’t be able to, and there is also no reason why they can’t go into a store and have their kid’s name put on a birthday cake.  Once again, this is about language, plain and simple.  Some people are just a little freaked out by certain words and, apparently, names.  (Remember all the neo-cons who just had to repeatedly remind everyone of Obama’s middle name?)  What is it, exactly, that is “inappropriate” about this kid’s name?  I mean, really?  OK, he has the same name as the guy who masterminded the murder of millions of Jews.  I suppose that is unfortunate, depending on your politics, but does that mean that somehow Little Hitler is guilty of some crime by association?  I mean, do all the Mark Chapmans of the world go around plotting assassinations because they happen to share the name of the wacko who killed John Lennon?   Of course not.

But, of course, there is the argument that a private business can refuse service on any grounds to any person for any reason (within the law, of course).  Point taken, fine – but my whole point is about the uptightedness of these business owners, and of people in general.  Let’s stop worrying about words, and worry more about intentions.  This family just wanted a cake with their kid’s name on it.   I don’t know about you, but I am holding out hope that I still live in a free country.  So, instead of having these knee-jerk, emotional reactions, can’t we all just agree to be civilized adults and leave language alone??