Idol schmidol.

May 21, 2008

Can someone please tell me why people go completely apeshit over American Idol?

My theory is that the average viewer couldn’t care less about the music. They just like to watch people fail. Not win, mind you. Fail.

Look at The Biggest Loser. I happened to catch the season finale of this rigged dieting show a few weeks back. And when they announced Ali as the winner? We saw about 5 seconds of air time of celebratory confetti (that some poor bastards ALWAYS have to clean up – why do I always think those little things?) and that was it. All that build-up, and drama, over weeks and weeks and weeks of agonizing over calories and crunches, and it all boiled down to 5 seconds of screaming and crying and confetti. Oh, and “Tune in next season!”

I think that the whole process of reality TV – no matter the premise – is to watch people, week after week, fall flat on their faces. No one REALLY cares who wins. It’s all about who loses, who gets the harshest criticism, who creates the most drama and rocks the boat the hardest. Somehow, seeing all that failure makes us feel just a wee bit better about our own pathetic selves.

Please! Enlighten me, you Idol fans. Do you really give a shit about the next Kelly Clarkson wannabe (who is, incidentally, a wannabe in her own way) or do you just secretly wring your hands in pleasure every time Simon and Co. let that ax fall on those songbirds’ throats?