No lie – in my travels this morning, I saw a truck marked “pest control” pull into the local high school’s parking lot.

Somehow, it made me think of this:

More jugs and java.

May 26, 2009

This just in – police are hot on the trail of a waitress who was caught in her work uniform outside of the Grand View Topless Coffee Shop.  Apparently, the woman was seen outside of the shop – GASP! – not wearing a top.

Am I missing something here?  What’s there to investigate?  The woman works at the Grand View, so obviously that means she doesn’t wear a top.   Hence the TOPLESS part of TOPLESS COFFEE SHOP.  So she stepped outside for a moment.  Does the D.A. really need to get involved with this?  The report reads, “A state trooper was sent to investigate.”  Yeah, and I’m sure he was loath to the task, too.

So, it’s OK to be topless indoors (as well it should) but not outside?  Men enjoy the right to walk around in public without a shirt.  Why not women?  Seriously, why not women? Aren’t the six-pack abs or shapely pecs on a man as much of a turn-on as a pair of women’s breasts?  Call me stupid, but I really don’t understand why we are so prudish in this society.

Let me get this straight – the White House really needed new photos of Air Force One, so they flew low over Manhattan and scared the shit out of a bunch of people.  About $400,000 was blown on this little joyride, and all for this unspectacular shot?


You mean to tell me these fuckers have never heard of Photoshop?  Could’ve saved a lot of money and lot of grief.  But what do I know?  I’m one of the poor shmucks who paid the bill for this bullshit.


May 7, 2009

(Sorry, I couldn’t resist it. )

You know, as much as I complain sometimes about my beloved state of Maine – snow on the ground 6 months out of the year, very rural, little culture, lousy job market, high taxes, an outrageous rate of alcoholism (including the highest per-capita consumption of Allen’s coffee-flavored brandy in the nation) – sometimes, we get things right around here.

Gov. John Baldacci finally came to his senses and signed into law the bill that will legalize gay marriage in this state.  The Democrat was, at one time, very much opposed to gay marriage (’cause he’s a Catholic – big surprise there) but he finally realized, as he put, that this was about “fairness”.  His words: “I have come to believe that this is a question of fairness and of equal protection under the law, and that a civil union is not equal to civil marriage.” Right-o!

Of course, all the religious wackos are already promising to launch a petition drive to put a people’s veto referendum on the ballot.  What the fuck is it with these people?  They really think that some god “up there” gives a damn about what people do with their genitalia?  Are we really living in a world where the idea of privacy, in the minds of the devout, is completely null and void, and that they have the divine authority to reinterpret the words of a few sand-strewn scribes from a previous era to whom the wheelbarrow was a major technological feat and use those reinterpreted words to hideously invade the most private and most basic of human functions?  Honestly, I just don’t get it with these nutcases.

Well, for now at least, I’ll be thrilled to see gay couples lining up to get their marriage licenses.  (Hey!  Those licenses cost money.  So do weddings and all the bells and whistles that go along with them.  And that’s good for the economy.  Sounds like a win-win to me.)  Maine’s neighbors to the west in New Hampshire are finally waking up, too.  Gov. Lynch, another Democrat, has been on the fence on this, and still is as of this writing, even as the passed bill sits on his desk awaiting his signature.  Let’s hope that reason and fairness will win out once again.