June 7, 2009
A brown colored horse with a strange name was the winner in Saturday’s Belmont Stakes race, beating out an entire group of brown horses similarly named in a peculiar manner.
The winning animal, a very fast and lean muscular type, was apparently not favored to win the race. Another brown horse, with a slightly differently colored nose, was heavily favored to win.
The winning horse’s owner, a man of immeasurable monetary wealth, expressed his gratitude for winning the race and offered condolences to the other immeasurable wealthy men who suffered defeat. “Our horse and jockey went out there and gave 100%,” the winning wealthy man said, who is set to add even more money to his already immense holdings as a result of Saturday’s race.
The winning jockey - a very short and skinny, effeminate man with a history of eating disorders, born into a wealthy family of horse breeders and whose diminutive physical stature and insatiably competitive nature left him no choice but to give up any dreams of other professional sports and pursue a career as a racing jockey – also commented on the race, saying, “This horse is just fast and powerful. This animal did an amazing job.”